Tuesday, February 22, 2011

Friday, February 11, 2011

Tuesday, February 8, 2011

Radiohead - In Rainbows

This has been the most perfect day I have ever... seen. 



Just get it.
Download

Saturday, February 5, 2011

Quote - Lawrence Scarpantoni

One day a random man was having fun in a random way in a random location with random people doing random shit. After a random amount of hours, the random people start to walk some random dogs they randomly found in a random location. The random dogs decided to be extremely random and started to randomly bite on their legs. The random men started to just yell out random syllables and random words because they are random and so are penguins. Then, randomly, they start to eat sandwhiches that randomly appeard from the dog’s anus’s and apparently tasted quite delightfully random. So, then a random king from a random universe started to eat some bacon. Then a random pig came up to him and somehow started to randomly speak to him and hating his “bacon eating-ness”. Then they randomly started kissing while a magical random dolphin started to flap his random WINGS. I’m not saying that everyone should be random, but the implication is being that people should really just eat lots of bacon and crap out more sandwhiches than possible, so basically any amount of sandwhiches. Then a random man with toast and cheesy randomness ate some tomato’s. Suddenly, a creepy random man in a creepy random mask started to randomly dance like a hippo trying to scrape shit off his nostrols. If nobody can actually understand the random-ness of this random story, then maybe your brain cannot naturally generate fun randomly and you should go randomly throw yourself off a random cliff with jagged spikes directly facing you from the bottom of the bottomless pit, because fun is random and awesome with random nuts and tibbles and poop. If hulk were to randomly jump off of a rooftop and land infront of you, randomly, you wouldn’t be shitting your pants, you’d be laughing, aplauding, and THEN shitting your pants while he decapitates your NUT  SACK. If you don’t find ranomness entertaining then maybe you should close this window and beat the shit out of your PC/Laptop or whatever you use to read this brilliant piece of random awesomeness and then take a piss on your nearest router/modem, then, you may as well take a dump on the nearest petrol station’s worker. Goodbye, noobs

Tuesday, February 1, 2011

This is probably the best advice I've read in a while

Are you shy? Do you have difficulty coping with people or situations? Then I have good news for you. You do not have to suffer from shyness and you should not feel insecure and fear that you are being judged with every step you take.
Winning the war with shyness takes practice, but is definitely well worth the effort as the result is increasing confidence and self esteem. Wake up feeling good about yourself, able to face the world with confidence and security and the knowing that no feeling of shyness can come in your way of achieving your desires.




 




There are hundreds of books written on the subject of how beat shyness and gain confidence, but there are a few techniques that anyone can practice. Here are 6 suggestions of techniques on how to overcome your shyness:
1. Every morning, as soon as you get up, get in front of a mirror and say out loud "I feel terrific! I feel terrific! I feel terrific!" Repeat this affirmation with enthusiasm at least ten times everyday until it's ingrained into your subconscious mind. If feel a little self conscious to begin with lock yourself in the bathroom. The results will amaze you.
2. Feel good about yourself. Look your best. Dress up more often. This gives you an extra feeling of confidence and self esteem. On its own just knowing that you look good will boost your confidence and reinforce with others that there are things about you that are worth getting to know.
3. Take a risk at least once a day. It's very invigorating and conquering fears by taking risks helps you grow in confidence and self esteem. Start with small risks and fears and as you overcome them move onto bigger things. There's nothing you cannot do. Be confident in knowing that change can only help you grow, and boost your self confidence.
4. When you are engaged in a one to one conversation, or with a larger group of people, let them know that you're shy. This prevents them from misreading you and they are far more likely to invite you into the conversation rather than leave you just listening and wishing you could contribute.
Many people, me included, find following a conversation in a noisy room difficult. If you are having difficulty say so and move so that you can hear. People respect honesty, and vulnerability and you will attract more honest people into your life as a result.
5. Rejection is a fact of life that everyone experiences. It is rarely you that is being rejected. If you are rejected, for example if you ask someone for a date, remember that everyone has different likes and dislikes. You may be attracted to one type of person and not others. The same applies to other people and you are probably just not their type. That does not devalue you in any way. Accept this and know that you will get over it. Never take it personally and keep in mind that if people reject you it is because of their own likes and dislikes and not because of who you are. You are equally entitled to reject others because of your likes and dislikes.
6. Engage in an activities that make you feel excited and good about yourself or start a hobby that gives you a feeling of relaxation. This could be anything from gardening to Tai Chi to Karate. Take some lessons, learn or master a musical instrument or take singing lessons. Do something that excites you and take a risk. Exploring things that make you feel excited is a great antidote for shyness.

Here's the kind of conversation I usually have with my friends


22:42
I sense that he loves you deep inside

22:43
rofl. wtf?

22:43
.and wants to fuck your asshole until poop comes out and your constipated for days

22:43
aww, wtf!?!? LOL
that's just.. WTF!?!?! lol

22:43
That's what happened with your mum

22:44
omg...
lol
that's just wrong
hahaha

22:44
...and truee

22:44
probably not..

22:45
... well... i didn't want to tell you.
neither did your mum for that matter

22:46
ohkay.. shh now

22:47
Do I need to go down to details?

22:47
sigh fine..

22:48
It all happened one afternoon. You hadn't come back from school yet and I was relaxing in the lounge room with your two dogs
This was a week after your party

22:49
lol

22:49
Your mum comes into the room with cookies, pretty awesome ones at that
I said thanks and went back to watching stupid american tv shows

22:49
Great.. so this is the story of How I Fucked Your Mother? haha

22:49
Your mum sat there, as if constipated already

22:50
ahahaha..

22:50
Breathing heavily. I watched her chest lapse up and down in a quick motion for what seemed like decades

22:50
loool

22:50
We stared at each other for a moment and smiled shyly at each other. I felt the moment, she totally wanted it.

22:51
omg.. hahaha

22:51
I reached towards her and she leaned back into the comfy couch cushion, grasping it with her claws
She purred deeply and in baritone, surprisingly male like

22:51
rofl

22:51
This was a bit of an off put, but I hadn't had sex for a couple of weeks so I was desperate

22:52
ROFL

22:52
I continued until she had her fifth orgasm in the minute. Then we went to the next level.
She said to wait on the couch for a minute.

22:52
lol
Extreme Movie :P:P

22:52
And so I did, then she came back in a lion costume, riding a sheep for some unrelevant reason.

22:53
ahaha. wtf?

22:53
It was kinda kinky though, so I went along with it.. but in order to fuck her totally, i had to bone the sheep first.
It was a challenge I had to make, for the best of my penis.

22:53
LOOOL!

22:54
I knew your mum was a milf and I had to go all the way so I could continue the quest to become teh_milkpwnerer
*milf

22:54
lololololololol

22:54
So anyways. I groped the sheep awkwardly from behind and continued my dirty work. One thing that I particularly disliked was the maggots in the asshole and wool scraping past my foreskin. Alas I put up with it

22:55
lol
ewwwys

22:55
Finally she said enough and ripped off her clothes in a millisecond. But it wasn't over just yet.

22:55
omg... hahaha

22:55
Underneath her lioness costume was a milipede costume

22:55
WHAT!!??! lol

22:55
and on the millipede costume was thousands of spiders and cockroaches

22:56
oh seriously..

22:56
I thought what the hell, boning a millipede sounds like a pretty awesome story to tell my friends. So yeah I did it

22:56
sorry, i planted them there
I can tell you the story

22:56
It was messy and at one point i think i stabbed a golden orb spider with my dick

22:56
rofl

22:57
It's impaled body lay there at the end of my dick and yet your mother continued to torture me by making the rest of the spiders crawl until me
Seriously dude. Your mum is weird as
Anyways, that's the story.
*into me

22:57
lol.. wtf?
we should like make a video of that or post it on the website
cause that is some really funny shit
Just, at the end. The guy who you told it to is like super shocked, and his eyes are staring at you, wide open
like.. A flash animation or something
Or pivot.. i guess