Wednesday, September 21, 2011

Getting through life a little bit better

A thing I've found with being in a relationship is that it's emotionally tiring (or at least the ones I've in). It's just so fucking dramatic and for almost no reason. It's not like it's anyone's fault, it just ends up that way because being close to someone means you're going to make mistakes and that's a given. The best thing coming out of a relationship is just spending some time with friends and making brownies.
I'm sorry, but I don't think a lot of people realize this
MAKE FUCKING BROWNIES

oh and friends, hang out with them. BUT FUCKING BROWNIESSS MANNNNN. So anyways. You can only hope, coming out of a difficult relationship, that the person you were with will just stop pestering with you. It took my ex about a month to realize this. Just makes you wonder what truly goes on in the other person's head, it's almost deluded. They would say things like "we didn't come this far to just turn around" Well sorry but I don't like facing South, i wanna turn around to North instead. Oh sorry, did that hurt your feelings trolololol.
Girls, they seem to wonder why boys are such dickheads and it's mainly because of girls in the first place. The girls advertise themselves and generally want to be in a relationship so much that they make themselves vulnerable to being with a guy who's just in it for the sex/doesn't care for the relationship. Think about it.

Friday, July 15, 2011

Personal Blog 1#

The darkness of sleep. It’s so serene yet foreboding. Like there’s some sort of monster inside yourself, controlling your subconsciousness and giving you the exact dreams you don’t want. Some weird shit goes down in dreams. But in some way they all vaguely correspond to daily events  You wake up, to another day in the same life. It really depends how good your life is.  It could be fucking wonderful, just magnificent. You could be loving it, having the best girlfriend, having the best friends, having all your wishes coming true, getting good grades, having time to yourself- everything that makes life… life. Problem is, when you bring certain people into your life, you find that a lot of pain comes with it. Sure, you become closer to the person and you start to care and it brings benefits. Being in a relationship is a great example, actually. Everything goes so well, you care, you do all the cute things cute couples do. Like lying on the couch together watching movies, saying how much we love each other. Sending all those amazingly long texts. Things fuck up though, you end up in arguments. If the argument is bad enough, you lose the person. And it fucking hurts. It’s not like you can stop just like that. With relationships with people and. It’s just endless. Social conventions, expectations… I can’t even bother writing down all the things that’s going to fuck up when you get close to someone. I’m not trying to ride my high horse here, because in reality, it’s all your own fault. All your actions and mistakes. It all comes down to you. Maybe it’s because you hold up for so long, you’re bound to make mistakes here and there. Everyone does and it’s amazing that religions even put the pressure of not doing any sins. Fuck, of course you’re going to sin. It’s irreversible. So, let’s just say I make one- fuck it two. Three. Three mistake and lose it. Just lost myself to being free, not restricted to any invisible rules set down by the social collective, then voila. Girlfriend gone. Now she hates me and my guts, apparently I’m the biggest bullshit artist. Even if she didn’t condemn it, she encouraged it. That’s that, that’s how it works out in the end. “Everything happens for a reason.” That’s what I hear a lot. Maybe it does. But it still fucking hurts. So I guess I will just move on to a better girl, better feelings. That’s how it works out. It’s kind of a big mindfuck, just stored up in your head. It happens to everyone I swear, because growing up is hard. It’s worth it, but it’s still hard to get through. I want to have someone perfect again to sleep by. And not feel the stresses of today and not feel the pain of yesterday and the pang of what might happen tomorrow. Just someone that actually understands these things and doesn’t fucking whine about what kind of shoes you were or what kind of t-shirt you wore the week before. It got so tiring, it really did. I’m allowed to wear whatever the fuck I want and I’m allowed to act however the fuck I want and the last thing I need is a girlfriend like my last that would get pissed at the slightest mistake or criticize who I am. Even if it was subconscious. No doubt, I made mistakes and I’m not perfect. I guess some personalities don’t click with others and that’s that. I hate some girls. I just see them shouting and acting like retards on buses and on streets. It’s not so much that, but it’s that judgmental shit they pull on you and all the ignorant comments.
“oh maah gosh you look soo gay”. I just don’t give a fuck. You know, there is a story behind every person. That hobo that you saw in the city? Yeah, he got left in a cardboard box as a baby with no one to look after him. He had to try to live off the streets by selling dope at the age of 5. Now he's 40 with no one that cares for him and everyone just walks past him, despising the guy for his clothes. No, no, no, no, just ignore all the good human morales. Just judge him for what he looks like. I don't think people realize how much a hug and 5 dollars means to a hobo. Some, they just want to live. They want someone to care for them. I guess not. Because this world is so cold now. 

meowmeow ;33

I feel like a penguin, all moshy and stuff. heheheh being tipesy is strangely fun. Not something I would do often, but yeah why not. Thing is, I broke up with my girlfriend or she dumped me. I think she dumped me. So there you go. Everything going to well, then yeah. blarg. meow. Now I'm just wondering if I should care or just ignore any silly feelings. Funny music, friends, liquor, videos, movies all help. 


Wednesday, June 22, 2011

schizophrenia. in lyrics.

The roof is pulling off by its fingernails
Your voice is rapping on my window sill
Let me back
Let me back
I promise to be good
Don't look in the mirror
At the face you don't recognize
Help me call the doctor
Put me inside
Put me inside
Put me inside
Put me inside
Put me inside
I keep the wolf from the door
But he calls me up
Calls me on the phone
Tells me all the ways that he's going to mess me up
How come I end up where I started?
How can I end up where I went wrong?
Won't take my eyes off the ball again
You reel me out and you cut the string
My thoughts are misguided and a little na�ve
And I twitch and I salivate like with myxomatosis
You should put me in a home or you should put me down
I got myxomatosis
I got myxomatosis
Yeah, no one likes a smart ass but we all like stars
That wasn't my intention! I did it for a reason!
He shook hands with the cripples
And gave them all milk
He did a few card tricks
For his mafia geeks
I don't know why I feel so tongue-tied
Don't know why I feel so skinned alive
But they are trapdoors
That you can't come back from
Tears of joy now scare ourselves of all that you want to be
Just got paid and now you're going, how inside you please
If I get scared I'll just call you and I'll miss your glow as I unsettle
Oh, and I'll always feel, I will always be
Right, one, two, three, four
So sell your suit and tie and come and live with me
Leukemia schizophrenia polyethylene
There is no significant risk to your health
She used to be beautiful once as well
Plastic bag, middle class, polyethylene
Decaffeinate, unleaded, keep all surfaces clean
If you don't believe this, sell your soul
If you don't get into it, no one will
Please could you stop the noise, I'm trying to get some rest
From all the unborn chicken voices in my head
What's that, what's that?
And I might as well
I might as well
Sleepy jack the fire drill
Around, around, around, around, around

Around

Cut the kids in half
Cut the kids in half
Cut the kids in half

Release me
Release me

Release me

Release me
Kill me Sarah, kill me again... with love
It's gonna be a glorious day
I have no idea what I am talking about
I am trapped in this body and can't get out
Oh
And either way you turn, I'll be there
Open up your skull, I'll be there
Climbing up the walls
It's always best when the light is off
It's always better on the outside
Fifteen blows to the back of your head
Fifteen blows to your mind
So lock the kids up safe tonight
Shut the eyes in the cupboard
I've got the smile of a local man
Who's got the loneliest feeling
It brought me to my knees
They got a skin and they put me in
They got a skin and they put me in
All the lines wrapped around my face
All the lines wrapped around my face
And for anyone else to see
I was stronger
I call up my friend, the good angel
But she's out with
Her ansaphone
She says she would
Love to come help
But the sea would electrocute us all
Nice dream

I was better
Picked you out
Limb by limb and tooth by tooth
Tearing up inside of me
Every day, every hour
Now don't say a word
No, don't yell out
Never mind
Let you out
Led you back
Stay on
Sit down
Let it fall
Let it fall
Let it fall
Let it fall
hat there
That's not me
I go
Where I please
I walk through walls
I float down the Liffey
I'm not here
This isn't happening
I'm not here
I'm not here
In a little while
I'll be gone
The moment's already passed
Yeah it's gone
And I'm not here
This isn't happening
I'm not here
I'm not here
Strobe lights and blown speakers
Fireworks and hurricanes
I'm not here
This isn't happening
I'm not here
I'm not here
Slight of hand
Jump off the end
Into a clear lake
No one around
Just dragonflies
Flying to the side
No one gets hurt
You've done nothing wrong
Slide your hand
Jump off the end
The water's clear
And innocent
The water's clear
And innocent

Friday, June 10, 2011

The Deliciousness of Brownies and Cupcakes

Probably some of the most amazing things on earth... the way how the chocolatey goodness indulges your taste buds in a wholesome, flavour-full way. The little beads of concentrated chocolate that you chew on with the think, brown, sugery icing and the ice cold Coca-Cola. The caramel waltzes around your mouth and doesn't leave until you wash it down with the even more caramel-like beverage.


Wednesday, May 18, 2011

My twitter and tumblr

I find both these social networking sites 10 thousand times more interesting then Facebook, especially when considering they are valuable assets to have

mah tumblah
meh twetteh

Wednesday, May 11, 2011

Devin Townsend Project - Deconstruction

1."Praise the Lowered"  6:02
2."Stand"  9:36
3."Juular"  3:46
4."Planet of the Apes"  10:59
5."Sumeria"  6:37
6."The Mighty Masturbator"  16:28
7."Pandemic"  3:298."Deconstruction"  9:27
9."Poltergeist"  4:25

And yes that is a 16 minute song about a... mighty masturbator?

http://www.mediafire.com/?nog5328s30626a7

Some pretty cool Renaissance Architecture

I've been playing a lot of a game called "Assassin's Creed II", which is a game that revolves around the Italian Renaissance Period. For those of you that don't know, the Renaissance Era basically rebirthed Western Culture from the gloomy, shitty Medieval and Dark Ages. Here's some pictures to support this:







Saturday, March 26, 2011

Inlook on personalities

The proudly person is convinced that his needs are more important from the needs of others. This person wants a lot of attention and he does not knows or to be tolerant. He is capable of insulting when his behaviors are criticized and judged. In some cases pride repel of using good odds. He loses his friends, he doesn't talk and he does not have good relation with all his family.
Effeminated child changes to a prideful person
Too much of attention in the childhood by the parents can cause the child to feel that he is special, better from all the people, all the world is circling around him. He becomes used on accomplishing his wishes by others. That kind of child is transformed in egotistic person with lots of needs, his reactions are almost every time aggressive and with a lot of conflicts with his surrounding.
Pride can also be a result from too much of criticizing and underestimating in the childhood or puberty. That's the cause why some children become prideful and egocentric, but behind the mask there is a lot of fear and insecure ness.
Those people are turn only inside them, they always feel lack of attention, underestimated by the surrounding, they strive always to be in the primary plan. In a word those people are best at complicating the things. That's why if you can't accept your own imperfections, at least don't attack the others who are trying to tell your lacks. It has come the final hour to dethrone yourself and start to appreciate the others. Remember that you are not better nor worst from others, but surely you are unique just like all the people.
Open your heart and stop overwhelming, discover what the others think and try to realize how they feel, expand you view to the world. Then learn to live with others, pull the best from you without expecting for return. It's not about becoming subordinated or to care more about the others instead of you, it's simply about realizing that friendship or love include respect and generous. That's the only way of discovering the real and sincere interpersonal relations.How to moderate the egoism
Forgive yourself, thank yourself, don't insist, those are just a few things which you can do in order to moderate your egoism. You will become stronger person and you will make things better for you and the others around you. The best way of accomplishing this is to ask for forgiveness. It's hard I know, but it's not impossible. The hardest battle is the battle with yourself.
The prideful people think that their needs are the most important. No matter if he is at work or home this kind of person wants to attract most of the attention and he is incapable to request some help. If the person is not the center of the attention, he looses interest about the conversation he makes and stops to be active in it. By the way, that person doesn't show respect for anyone or anything.But too much of modesty is not so good
If the overdrove of pridefulness makes the relation hard, also the overwhelming of modesty makes problem because it makes us incapable of defending our own values and enunciations, our own opinion and feelings. The answer is to have balance between all those elements, not too much, not too little. It needs to be big enough to accomplish our need and small enough not to destroy what we have done. We need to be aware of what we are doing to us and around us and to insight whether we win or loose with our behavior.
You know the right choice, good luck!

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/120056

Thursday, March 24, 2011

Trying to learn a Pink Floyd song which is due to be performed tomorrow. Not much clue what I'm doing

Monday, March 21, 2011

Anyone who doesn't get this needs an education for the internet.
Unfortunately, my aforementioned Black Ops montage clip files aren't reading with Windows Movie Maker. Fuck you, Microsoft.

Saturday, March 19, 2011

Montages

I reckon I'll start working on a montage, in Black Ops, with nothing but snipers and pistols. Gonna work my ass off for it, but it'll be worth it. Got all the plans worked out. Now all it takes is a night full of fun.

Sunday, March 13, 2011

Oh Charlie Sheen, you legend.

Call of Duty - Black Ops - Ideal class

Main

CAR-15: man's best friend
Commando- Suppressor
Works so well as an all-rounded weapon and beats just about every gun if you have a good aim. 9/10 times you will win those agonizing gun duels or cat and mouse games or the shaky spray and pray AK74u. The same would go with the M16, although firing from the hip is down to chance.
Ballistic Knife
It's always a bit of a coin toss when it comes to knifing in Black Ops, which is exactly why the Ballistic Knife is such a useful utility. With it, you gain the upper hand in those sticky situations with awkward lunging and laggy swiping.
Frag
The frag is unmatched when compared to the other lethal grenades. Sure the Semtex is a nice sticky ball of explosive, but what does that have against a larger blast radius and quirky dancing and rolling on the floor.
Concussion
With Hacker or Warlord Pro, you can't go better with this handy beaker of death, as it disables enemy equipment and proves just as useful as a few flashbangs. You will often find that enemies have the inability to retaliate with the necessary proportion of reflexes and look sensitivity. 
Claymore
CLAYMORE LOLZZ!!11one!!! MOAR LEIK GAYMORE
It's basically a guaranteed free kill and unless you're going to set up a campfire with a motion sensor or jammer, which isn't usually needed with an mobile automatic assault rifle class. 
Ghost
Don't you hate the announcement of a spy plane? The badly accented voice actor is shit enough, but realizing that the enemy has a disadvantage is even worse. With Ghost, however, not only does the enemy not detect you on the radar (kudos for the suppressor as well) but it actually puts them at a disadvantage. The average Call of Duty enthusiast is rather dependent on their Spy planes and motion sensors and wouldn't anticipate the arrival of yourself aiming down sight, pounding bullets already. And speaking of aiming down sights...
Sleight of Hand (Pro)
Inevitably, you will always come across the gun fights where your opponent has the equal opportunity as you do, in which case Sleight of Hand is a must. The majority of people use it as their second perk and having it is essential with a gun like the Commando. There are cases where it might not be needed like
Spas-12 (Steady Aim)
L96A1 (Scout- beneficial to any sniper)
M14 (Hardened) 
AK74u (Warlord)
However we'll get to that later.
Hacker (Pro) 
It's pretty much the most versatile and useful perk in the game, especially with the hilarity of the pro version. Nothing is more satisfying that slapping the enemy care package with a bogey and seeing their reactions immediately after the killcam. Of course, it's not the humility that makes this such a good perk, but the sixth sense of seeing enemy equipment. Paired with concussions and you couldn't do better for the obnoxious campers with advantageous equipment.

Remember
Don't expect to run in no-mans land and come out alive, particularly on maps like Firing Range, Launch and Nuketown. The key is to stay on the outskirts and flank enemy spawns with careful consideration. If you are going to use this strategy then the kill streaks I would use is

1st Priority
4 Kills - Counter Spy Plane 
8 Kills - Blackbird
11 Kills - Attack Dogs 

2nd Priority
3 Kills - Spy Plane
5 Kills - Napalm Strike 
8 Kills - Rolling Thunder

3rd Priority
6 Kills - Mortar Strike
9 Kills - Huey 
11 Kills - Gunship 

It is up to you however. I know some people don't like using the Commando so much as the AUG or the Famas or the AK-47. If you are comfortable with using any of them, then go for it. Keep in mind that if the gun can handle a suppressor well, then you've got yourself a monster. Sometimes, an optical attachment is a better choice, compromising your ninja class for the sake of better aiming. So let's say you do choose a red dot or a reflex and a directive attitude... you'll be better off with adjustments from whatever mentioned above. Instead of Ghost, choose Flak Jacket. Because really, that perk and it's pro version can shift the game to your momentum.  

Happy pwning!

Tuesday, February 8, 2011

Saturday, February 5, 2011

Quote - Lawrence Scarpantoni

One day a random man was having fun in a random way in a random location with random people doing random shit. After a random amount of hours, the random people start to walk some random dogs they randomly found in a random location. The random dogs decided to be extremely random and started to randomly bite on their legs. The random men started to just yell out random syllables and random words because they are random and so are penguins. Then, randomly, they start to eat sandwhiches that randomly appeard from the dog’s anus’s and apparently tasted quite delightfully random. So, then a random king from a random universe started to eat some bacon. Then a random pig came up to him and somehow started to randomly speak to him and hating his “bacon eating-ness”. Then they randomly started kissing while a magical random dolphin started to flap his random WINGS. I’m not saying that everyone should be random, but the implication is being that people should really just eat lots of bacon and crap out more sandwhiches than possible, so basically any amount of sandwhiches. Then a random man with toast and cheesy randomness ate some tomato’s. Suddenly, a creepy random man in a creepy random mask started to randomly dance like a hippo trying to scrape shit off his nostrols. If nobody can actually understand the random-ness of this random story, then maybe your brain cannot naturally generate fun randomly and you should go randomly throw yourself off a random cliff with jagged spikes directly facing you from the bottom of the bottomless pit, because fun is random and awesome with random nuts and tibbles and poop. If hulk were to randomly jump off of a rooftop and land infront of you, randomly, you wouldn’t be shitting your pants, you’d be laughing, aplauding, and THEN shitting your pants while he decapitates your NUT  SACK. If you don’t find ranomness entertaining then maybe you should close this window and beat the shit out of your PC/Laptop or whatever you use to read this brilliant piece of random awesomeness and then take a piss on your nearest router/modem, then, you may as well take a dump on the nearest petrol station’s worker. Goodbye, noobs

Tuesday, February 1, 2011

This is probably the best advice I've read in a while

Are you shy? Do you have difficulty coping with people or situations? Then I have good news for you. You do not have to suffer from shyness and you should not feel insecure and fear that you are being judged with every step you take.
Winning the war with shyness takes practice, but is definitely well worth the effort as the result is increasing confidence and self esteem. Wake up feeling good about yourself, able to face the world with confidence and security and the knowing that no feeling of shyness can come in your way of achieving your desires.




 




There are hundreds of books written on the subject of how beat shyness and gain confidence, but there are a few techniques that anyone can practice. Here are 6 suggestions of techniques on how to overcome your shyness:
1. Every morning, as soon as you get up, get in front of a mirror and say out loud "I feel terrific! I feel terrific! I feel terrific!" Repeat this affirmation with enthusiasm at least ten times everyday until it's ingrained into your subconscious mind. If feel a little self conscious to begin with lock yourself in the bathroom. The results will amaze you.
2. Feel good about yourself. Look your best. Dress up more often. This gives you an extra feeling of confidence and self esteem. On its own just knowing that you look good will boost your confidence and reinforce with others that there are things about you that are worth getting to know.
3. Take a risk at least once a day. It's very invigorating and conquering fears by taking risks helps you grow in confidence and self esteem. Start with small risks and fears and as you overcome them move onto bigger things. There's nothing you cannot do. Be confident in knowing that change can only help you grow, and boost your self confidence.
4. When you are engaged in a one to one conversation, or with a larger group of people, let them know that you're shy. This prevents them from misreading you and they are far more likely to invite you into the conversation rather than leave you just listening and wishing you could contribute.
Many people, me included, find following a conversation in a noisy room difficult. If you are having difficulty say so and move so that you can hear. People respect honesty, and vulnerability and you will attract more honest people into your life as a result.
5. Rejection is a fact of life that everyone experiences. It is rarely you that is being rejected. If you are rejected, for example if you ask someone for a date, remember that everyone has different likes and dislikes. You may be attracted to one type of person and not others. The same applies to other people and you are probably just not their type. That does not devalue you in any way. Accept this and know that you will get over it. Never take it personally and keep in mind that if people reject you it is because of their own likes and dislikes and not because of who you are. You are equally entitled to reject others because of your likes and dislikes.
6. Engage in an activities that make you feel excited and good about yourself or start a hobby that gives you a feeling of relaxation. This could be anything from gardening to Tai Chi to Karate. Take some lessons, learn or master a musical instrument or take singing lessons. Do something that excites you and take a risk. Exploring things that make you feel excited is a great antidote for shyness.

Here's the kind of conversation I usually have with my friends


22:42
I sense that he loves you deep inside

22:43
rofl. wtf?

22:43
.and wants to fuck your asshole until poop comes out and your constipated for days

22:43
aww, wtf!?!? LOL
that's just.. WTF!?!?! lol

22:43
That's what happened with your mum

22:44
omg...
lol
that's just wrong
hahaha

22:44
...and truee

22:44
probably not..

22:45
... well... i didn't want to tell you.
neither did your mum for that matter

22:46
ohkay.. shh now

22:47
Do I need to go down to details?

22:47
sigh fine..

22:48
It all happened one afternoon. You hadn't come back from school yet and I was relaxing in the lounge room with your two dogs
This was a week after your party

22:49
lol

22:49
Your mum comes into the room with cookies, pretty awesome ones at that
I said thanks and went back to watching stupid american tv shows

22:49
Great.. so this is the story of How I Fucked Your Mother? haha

22:49
Your mum sat there, as if constipated already

22:50
ahahaha..

22:50
Breathing heavily. I watched her chest lapse up and down in a quick motion for what seemed like decades

22:50
loool

22:50
We stared at each other for a moment and smiled shyly at each other. I felt the moment, she totally wanted it.

22:51
omg.. hahaha

22:51
I reached towards her and she leaned back into the comfy couch cushion, grasping it with her claws
She purred deeply and in baritone, surprisingly male like

22:51
rofl

22:51
This was a bit of an off put, but I hadn't had sex for a couple of weeks so I was desperate

22:52
ROFL

22:52
I continued until she had her fifth orgasm in the minute. Then we went to the next level.
She said to wait on the couch for a minute.

22:52
lol
Extreme Movie :P:P

22:52
And so I did, then she came back in a lion costume, riding a sheep for some unrelevant reason.

22:53
ahaha. wtf?

22:53
It was kinda kinky though, so I went along with it.. but in order to fuck her totally, i had to bone the sheep first.
It was a challenge I had to make, for the best of my penis.

22:53
LOOOL!

22:54
I knew your mum was a milf and I had to go all the way so I could continue the quest to become teh_milkpwnerer
*milf

22:54
lololololololol

22:54
So anyways. I groped the sheep awkwardly from behind and continued my dirty work. One thing that I particularly disliked was the maggots in the asshole and wool scraping past my foreskin. Alas I put up with it

22:55
lol
ewwwys

22:55
Finally she said enough and ripped off her clothes in a millisecond. But it wasn't over just yet.

22:55
omg... hahaha

22:55
Underneath her lioness costume was a milipede costume

22:55
WHAT!!??! lol

22:55
and on the millipede costume was thousands of spiders and cockroaches

22:56
oh seriously..

22:56
I thought what the hell, boning a millipede sounds like a pretty awesome story to tell my friends. So yeah I did it

22:56
sorry, i planted them there
I can tell you the story

22:56
It was messy and at one point i think i stabbed a golden orb spider with my dick

22:56
rofl

22:57
It's impaled body lay there at the end of my dick and yet your mother continued to torture me by making the rest of the spiders crawl until me
Seriously dude. Your mum is weird as
Anyways, that's the story.
*into me

22:57
lol.. wtf?
we should like make a video of that or post it on the website
cause that is some really funny shit
Just, at the end. The guy who you told it to is like super shocked, and his eyes are staring at you, wide open
like.. A flash animation or something
Or pivot.. i guess